Thursday, September 14

An Nafs

Life is scary, and the more we seem to study it, the greater the magnitude of everything. And I suppose I should add that as our fears grow, it is imperative to our sanities--to our souls--to accordingly cultivate our hopes.

Does it all come down to trust? Perhaps. But knowledge is nothing without action, and absolute trust, but lack of awareness of one's dependency, responsibilities, burdens of guilt, etc., couldn't be "trust" but would rather be blindness. rt?

I was going to make this next post about being a woman, and those who try to do so, "phenomenally." I was going to write this the day before yesterday, after studying Zora Neale Hurston (of whom I certainly am not a fan)--upon realizing that the definition of "woman" is mostly dependent on how she defines herself. Something private, personal, and perhaps even partly subconscious. The many women who flirt with the parameters of life, out of conviction, out of curiosity...considering how much I am like them in this way... That was the day before yesterday.

Since then, I was reminded about death, and the questioning in the grave. Three questions: Who is your Lord? Who is your Prophet? and What is your religion? (I think I have that right--please correct me if I'm not.)

The first of these changed this path I've allowed myself to drift down over the past year or so...this "exploratory phase" I've recently referred to... Because upon the questioning of the first, when my body will prevent me from lying (my clouds of self-deluded explanations and excuses cleared and the apparent--piercing), I may just answer, "Nafsy." ("My self")

A person driven by his own faculties of reason, and solely so, is just that. Such a person follows the guidance of his reason. A person who worships Allah--who would reply "Allah" upon being questioned by the Angels, Munkar and Nakir--would certainly have lived a life in which he sought guidance from Allah so that all his faculties were guided and not misguided. Awareness and seeking seem to be everything.

Yet every breath is an opportunity, a possibility, a sign of mercy and compassion. We could never begin to count off how many we have carelessly let pass us by.

2 comments:

EA said...

Hello Samira. Yes, you can list me here, what an honor!!

Samira said...

the honor is all mine :)